Squatties and knocking girls off mopeds

The difficulty of posting. I find that posting is rarely on the forefront of my mind here. I just don't think about it that often. The times I do I can't think of anything to say. So much of my life is not fit for print these days. Dont' get me wrong I wish I could just share everything with everyone. It's just not that easy. Never is.

So why am I posting tonight? I wanted to remain a part of this. I didn't want to give up on it. I don't want to give up on the however many of us there are plus Tiffany blog thing we have going. I was trying to think of funny stories to tell, but they just seem to lack.

I went for a 15 or so mile bike ride to this store out in the boonies with a friend of mine. It was a cool camping store, but after like 5 seconds of walking around I had to go to the bathroom really bad. That's a bad condition to be in 8-10 miles out from home and at a store with unknown bathroom conditions and no personal load of toilet paper. Luckily even in the slighty ridiculous situations God provides. It's a weird place when you're thankful, so so so thankful for a nice squatty. These it turned out were top of the line, full height stalls! With doors! And yes, God even let them deem it a good idea to include some paper towels in the hand rinsing area (washing implies soap).

A day in the life. They don't mention that in those this is where I live videos do they? Nor do they mention the peril you place other people by bringing your Western mentality and driving abilities to the far side of the world.

This girl was making a crazy wide turn on her moped thing and I was flying on my bike and she was about to pinch me against the wall. Well what could I do? It was me or her and I didn't want to fall on my face, so I kicked her moped and made her spin out and crash.

That's what she would have said if I had stopped to ask if she was alright. I think there is still some shock when I ride by unsuspecting mopeds. One I'm really white. That's not normal here. Two I'm going faster than them and bike's don't go faster than motorized vehicles right? I always forget that part. Anyway she was swerving into me and was going to pinch me against the little wall to keep us from spilling out into the street. So I whistled somewhat loudly to draw her attention to the collision course we were on. (My options in retrospect were to slow down or stop or be crushed). I don't think of the stopping option very often. So she notices me and jerks away really fast, unfortunately her front tire was already colliding with my foot and my velocity and her turning the bike caused my foot to accelerate the rate at which her front tire was turning to the right, causing a sudden deceleration and a sort of falling over motion.

A quick sorry and I'm was off again. I was going even faster so she wouldn't catch up with me, thank goodness she didn't. That'd be really awkward.

See what I mean, these stories don't feel as funny as they do when you lived through them. I could be wrong, I hope you see the humor. I miss you guys. I'm still here.